ideologies & illusions

music.

-I keep coming back to horse feathers & frightened rabbit. they're just so good. 

-Nathanael Mehrens is an amazing musician. seriously. he's legit and really quite impressive. lets be honest. and we're friends. ish.  i haven't uploaded it to my computer yet, but every night i listen to it. its fantastic. 

movies. can't wait for "where the wild things are" to come out. its going to be amazing. i can feel it in my bones. [ http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi3413574425/ ]  i also think it is quite vital that whoever it is that creates these things [spike jones. jump on this.] please create a movie of "the little prince" its one of my very favorites. 

a couple updates: 

 - front man homeboy. the end. 

 - caya started having nightmares. 

 - mikey signed me up for Paste magazine [pastemagazine.com] under the name "kamalama baergen"

 - kirsten isn't living with us. which is sad. 

 - i found 12 snails yesterday and am currently watching a slug crawl across the back window.

 - its tsunami-ing. and monsoon-ing.  hurrah. 

here's another list. These are things that I want in my life.  whatever my "career" [per say] is. 

make art - create, build, sell. 

have a home that is open & hospitable

-"money vase" concept. - open doors to a safe haven for people in need of beauty and hope 

travel. a lot. photograph it. capture what i see, who i interact with, etc. 

help people - the beauty & tragedy of the world.

a shop. co-own/own. maybe a cafe/venue or gallery/art/home store, where we make and sell. [preferably to do this with jax.]

have a flexible job, yet stable. 

have a degree, perhaps a masters. 

pay bills & not live in debt. 

have a studio. [that i don't have to travel far to. maybe just in my backyard]

write & illustrate a children's book. that's amazing. 

one day, to be married. perhaps even a family? 

i am still trying to rearrange & refine my values and ideologies. the things that i [should] desire are standing right in front of me. but the things that are "desirable" are those that enter in and out. passerby's. they don't last, they aren't full of integrity, they aren't faithful or fulfilling. my perspective is changing, slowly, and rather difficultly, but they're definitely being refined. 

love love love. 

ps. praise the lord my car is working thus far. prayers that the money will come in the fix the rest of the car. amen.